Mary, Martha, and Me: Learning to Serve Wholeheartedly

As I shared in my most recent posts, I have struggled lately with negativity and a sense of constant overwhelm. There just never seem to be enough hours in the day, enough energy in reserve to do all I should do, or enough of me to go around. My persistent frustration and anxiety was starting to be a real drain on me and, consequently, on the entire family.

At the same time, after I finished up my previous Bible reading plan, I decided that in February I wanted to do more actual Bible study instead of just doing daily reading and checking that off my list. I am a member of the Simply Living for Him community, where Karen DeBeus posts daily devotionals, hosts Bible studies, and more! She hosted a study on Mary and Martha starting January, so I decided to jump in and do that one this month. Let me tell you, the Lord knew it was exactly what I was going to need right now!

I’m sure we are all relatively familiar with the account of Martha and Mary and their encounter with Jesus in their home, but for the sake of discussion, let’s reread this passage together:

Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house.
And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching.
But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.”
But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things,
but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”

Luke 10: 38-42 (ESV)

I think in the past whenever I have heard people teach on this passage, all I’ve heard was that Martha was too busy doing things, and she should have been sitting there with Mary just listening to Jesus. I always thought that Jesus was rebuking Martha, but as I looked at this passage more closely for myself, I realized that simply was not the case. Jesus does not say “Martha, Martha, you are doing too many things and serving too much.” He says, “…you are anxious and troubled about many things.

Serving is not a bad thing. Being busy and having a lot of work to do is not necessarily a problem, if it is the work God has set before us in a season. The problem Martha had was that her heart and mind were anxious and troubled about many things. Other translations of the roots of those words are “worried,” “bothered,” “disturbed,” or “disquieted.” Martha was distracted by many cares. Her heart was divided. She was serving her Master outwardly, but her heart was inwardly focussed on herself. So she became resentful and accusatory toward her sister. Ouch. Been there. Done that.

So Jesus gently redirects Martha’s focus. He reminds her that to have an undivided heart is the key to true service, true worship. One thing is necessary. One thing only cannot be taken from us. That one thing is our relationship with Jesus Christ. He cannot be taken from us, even when we are busy with much serving. We can be busy about the work He gives us to do while keeping out eyes and hearts focussed on Him.

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men,
knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.

Colossians 3: 23-24 (ESV)

Also, I want to note that there is hope for us, as there was hope for Martha. If you look at John 12 in which Jesus returns to Bethany before Passover and eats at Martha and Mary’s house again, you might notice some similarities and some differences with the Luke 10 passage.

Six days before the Passover, Jesus therefore came to Bethany, where Lazarus was, whom Jesus had raised from the dead. So they gave a dinner for him there. Martha served, and Lazarus was one of those reclining with him at table.
Mary therefore took a pound of expensive ointment made from pure nard, and anointed the feet of Jesus and wiped his feet with her hair. The house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume.
But Judas Iscariot, one of his disciples (he who was about to betray him), said, “Why was this ointment not sold for three hundred denarii and given to the poor?”
He said this, not because he cared about the poor, but because he was a thief, and having charge of the moneybag he used to help himself to what was put into it.
Jesus said, “Leave her alone, so that she may keep it for the day of my burial. For the poor you always have with you, but you do not always have me.”

John 12: 1-8 (ESV)

Martha is serving again, busy about the meal. Mary is at Jesus’ feet again, this time pouring out what may very well have been her most valuable earthly possession. But does Martha scold? Does she again demand that Mary stop this anointing nonsense and get to work in the kitchen? Nope. This time Martha is quiet and working in the background.

Of course, Scripture doesn’t spell it out, but I do wonder if over time spent with Jesus, Martha has learned how to serve with a whole, undivided heart. I know that that is what I want to learn to do. And spending more time with Jesus every day, sitting at His feet like Mary, is how I hope to do just that. If you are worried and distracted by many things, I would encourage you to do the same.

Faithfully Moving Forward While Honestly Looking Back

This year started out much like any other for me, though perhaps with less anticipation and expectation than most. Call me jaded, but I had no illusions that the world would suddenly return to pre-COVID, pre-election peacefulness and predictability once we flipped the page on the calendar. No, instead, as much as I may yearn to go back to what seemed be better days, I knew that the outside world and culture would continue on in much the same way it has been. And this knowledge did not encourage me one single bit. In fact, to tell the truth, I’ve been a bit of a Negative Nancy here lately.

Moving during a “pandemic” and trying to find a new church, new friends and even new places to shop and get library books is not easy, let me tell you. Some bad attitudes and some complaining, and some long periods of loneliness are sure to crop up, especially when winter weather in the Appalachians compound the problem by keeping us home more. But even in the midst of these challenges, we do have a regular hiking group we see at least once a month, a church in which we have been able to start serving in a small way, and the option of Walmart pickup only 5 minutes from our house, not to mention 2 small local libraries to browse. So my situation was not really a good explanation for all the negativity.

This week I had to admit that most of my personal pain points have had more to do more with setting too expectations for myself a bit too high and not making enough of an effort to organize both my attitude and my life. I realized this ugly truth this week as I did some honest evaluation of how I truly spend my time on a typical day as well as an audit of our homeschool over this winter season. When I came to questions about how much time certain parts of our routine take, I was completely stumped. It suddenly dawned on me that our days have become so helter-skelter and unpredictable that I don’t have the foggiest notion how much time we are spending doing lessons or even how much time we should be spending at this point. Oops…

As much as this honest reflection hurts, it is also a necessary and beneficial step in moving forward. I have to identify what is not working, as well as what is, if I want to have any hope of changing things for the better. Although it is of some value to keep trudging on and doing the next thing, I think that truly being faithful involves more than just checking things off the list and going through the motions out of a sense of duty and drudgery. Faithfully moving forward should involve not only a choice to obey but to rejoice in obedience. And I certainly have not been modeling an attitude of joyful obedience recently. So it is time for an attitude adjustment, as well as some serious, prayerful consideration of how to adjust things in out house and homeschool to set us all up for success.

Even though I had felt for some time that things were going poorly, it wasn’t until I sat down and had an honest look back that I was able to see some of the causes of that feeling. It hasn’t been easy to stare my faults in the face like this, and more soul searching is definitely in order, but I do look forward now with hope for positive change. And I know now how to pray for guidance in taking the next step and move forward with faithfulness, and joy!

Over the Horizon: When God Moves Us Beyond What We Can See

The Road goes ever on and on

Down from the door where it began.

Now far ahead the Road has gone,

And I must follow, if I can,

Pursuing it with eager feet,

Until it joins some larger way,

Where many paths and errands meet.

J. R. R. Tolkien, The Lord of The Rings

The year began as others have, with new plans and goals and hopes. We try to think ahead and prepare ourselves as best we can, but as humans we never can tell what the future holds. And this year has shown us all, I think, how little we know about what will happen tomorrow or the next day. I don’t know about you, but I am a little weary of hearing words like “fluid” and “pivot” and “adjust.” As comfort-loving creatures, we would almost all prefer to keep things a little more controlled, familiar and predictable. Oftentimes, however, this tendency is actually not in our own best interest, and sometimes God has to shake things up a bit to get our attention.

As I sat down to write this post, a picture came to mind of Frodo Baggins in Tolkien’s The Fellowship of the Ring. He was just a young hobbit, setting out on a journey to an unknown destination, uncertain of his task. In my own personal life, aside from all the national and international chaos and crises, God has been mapping out a journey for me. This path is going to take me beyond my comfortable little hobbit hole and out into my own patch of wild and unexplored territory. This change is happening on two fronts simultaneously, and it all sometimes has me looking off to the horizon and feeling overwhelmed.

The First Path

Back in June, Alisa Keeton, founder of Revelation Wellness, announced that the next session of their instructor training program would be completely online for the first time ever due to COVID-19. Then she added that the cost of training would be half what it normally is. My heart skipped a beat when I realized that this might be my best opportunity to pursue the call that I sensed God laying on my heart 2 years ago when I attended Rev on the Road in Franklin, TN. After some prayer and talking with my husband, I knew that this was the time, and I joined Platoon 25!

But I am not fitness instructor material. This girl stinks at choreographed workouts, not to mention that she feels like throwing up anytime someone brings up leading group fitness classes. I’m not strong, or fast, or even very flexible. Beyond the fact that He wants me to get trained, I honestly have NO EARTHLY IDEA what God wants to do with this in my life! But in some strange way, the not knowing is a comfort. I don’t have to have a plan. I don’t need to see what is beyond the horizon. All I need is to simply trust that the Lord has it all prepared for me, and that He is getting me ready for the work He has for me to do. (To find out about Revelation Wellness Instructor Training, click the image below.)

The Road Goes On

The second path involves our whole family more directly, and it has us all heading into uncharted territory. In July, my husband was called by Bluefield College in Bluefield, VA to serve as their new Dean of Registration Services. Over the course of about 3 weeks, he had an online interview, an in-person interview, got hired, went on 2 unrelated business trips, and took us all house-hunting around Bluefield! It was quite a flurry of activity. He is now hard at work in his new job, and the kids and I are packing and cleaning and getting everything ready to move to our new house in our new state!

Bluefield is a unique town in that it crosses the border between Virginia and West Virginia, and it is situated in the heart of the beautiful Appalachia Mountains. For this born and bred Nebraska plains girl, driving into those tree-covered mountains was a brand new experience. Perhaps the more significant change for our children will be learning to live in town instead of the country. The house we are buying is right in the heart of historic Bluefield. They have never lived in a neighborhood before, and I have never lived on the side of a steep hill. The view on the horizon of our lives is certainly amazing, but it is also a little intimidating!

With Eager Feet

As I look out toward this future I can’t quite see, one thing is certain. God has us in position to be on mission for Him. What with being in town, our family can get more involved in our local community than we have ever been before. Even though I don’t know how God might ask me to use my RevWell training, I have a feeling He isn’t going to want me to just sit on the sidelines once I’ve finished. And what is more, we have a church and a homeschool community out there just waiting for us to find them, too! So it is with eager, though somewhat trepidatious, feet that we set out down the road. Truly, God only knows what lies ahead, just over the horizon.

A Brand New, Shiny Year

Ah, hello there, poor neglected blog and readers! I bet you thought I’d completely forgotten you and would never return! But no, I have thought of writing so very many times, and I simply kept talking myself out of it. The longer I am away, the harder it always seems to return. It is tricky to think of just how to begin again. But here I am at last, ready to dust off my writing cap and try it anyway, awkward as these new beginnings always are.

Since it is the early part of the new year, I am still thinking a little of the new things this year holds…a new year of AmblesideOnline with my son, beginning some gentle kindergarten lessons with my daughter, a shiny new bullet journal for my planner, a few tweaks for my daily routine, a renewed sense of balance in my approach to social media and tech, and lots and lots of new reading goals. It is all rather mundane and daily, but it is exciting nonetheless.

Unlike the last few years, I haven’t exactly chosen a word of the year for 2020. But if I did, it would probably be something having to do with intention, curation and habit. Over the last couple of months, I have been thinking a great deal about honing in on the truly valuable people, activities and things in my life. Weary of going through the motions of less-than-stellar habits, I am prioritizing intentional choices, making the most of the time I have wherever I can. My goal is to develop healthier, happier habits that will help me do just that. Our family has also been persistently decluttering both our stuff and our schedules, curating that which is truly important and joy-bringing in our family culture.

A few changes in my routine are along these lines, things like: applying digital minimalism concepts to social media and smart phone usage, tacking certain types of reading to certain times of day, and regularly using a habit tracker to see my progress. Each day marks a shift in my trajectory from just taking the path of least resistance to living with purpose and intention. Even when a change is small, it makes a difference!

What are you looking forward to as we embark on this shiny new year? Have you made any new goals? Do you choose a word of the year? I truly would love to hear from you in the comments. And if you are a fellow blogger (even if only sporadic, like me), if you leave a comment with a link to your blog, I will be sure to read your latest news!

Where Am I?

Testing, testing…Is anybody still out there in blog-land? I feel like I need to apologize for not being here myself. But supposedly, you’re not supposed to do that, at least according to the blogging gurus. Well, I gave up doing things according to them a long time ago. SO…..sorry I’ve been AWOL! There are reasons, and I want to explain.

Last time I posted, I was getting ready to go to the AmblesideOnline retreat. I thought I would come back and be able to write a post about all I learned. But life got so busy that I just haven’t had the time to do that. But I can say that it was an amazing time. I am still processing and recalling to mind some of the things I heard and learned at the AO Camp Meeting. I am so grateful that I had the privilege to attend!

One of the main reasons I have not had time to get back to blogging again is that at the retreat I started working with some new podcast clients! I am so blessed to be able to serve homeschool veterans Angelina Stanford and Cindy Rollins with their new podcast The Literary Life. They needed someone to build a website, create show notes, and help with other behind the scenes technical work. My husband is taking over their audio editing after Episode 4, but I plan to start doing it myself as soon as I am able to afford a new laptop. It is such a joy to get to work with these two amazing women, not to mention getting to listen to their content before anyone else! 😉 And getting to bless my family by contributing to our finances is a gift, too.

Another thing that is taking up more time these days is homeschooling and building local homeschool community. My son has taken some local enrichment classes at the nature park in our town this spring. We try to attend park days with other Charlotte Mason families a few times a month. And now the kids are both in swimming lessons a couple of times weekly. Plus, I am trying to start a Charlotte Mason moms’ fellowship and study group in our part of Middle TN. Real life community always takes precedence over online life, so I have to make time for that.

But as with many good things, there is a downside. In this case, the more time I spend working online for other people, the less time and creativity I have left for my own blog. Since both of the podcasts I am currently working on drop early in the week, I can no longer keep up my commitment to Wellness Wednesdays, even on a monthly basis. I hope that in some future season, I can come back to that, but right now I just can’t. I am also going to take a break from posting our monthly memory work plans. I have a good year’s worth (maybe more?) of those in the archive, so I feel like it is time to move on from that for the time being.

My hopes is that I can continue blogging on a sporadic basis, and probably most of those posts will be about our homeschool or Charlotte Mason/classical education or books, because those are the areas in my wheelhouse in this season. I hope that if those things interest you, you will hang in there with me even in these quiet times. So, all that to say, if you’ve been wondering where I am these days, that’s what’s going on! See you here again, maybe soon!